Our family spends some time sitting around, telling stories at the Sunday dinner table. Inevitably, Mike and I will end up talking about "when we were kids." Much of it tells of outrageously stupid or risky things we did as children or teenagers. Our adult kids get a kick out of our exploits, and can’t understand how we were allowed to get away with some of those risky things.
Recently we spent some time talking about safety issues for kids, now vs. then. Mike and I were raised in the 50’s and 60’s, which our kids lovingly refer to as "another planet." We don’t’ remember being unsafe at all, but apparently we were. Today the TV, the doctor’s office, the stores, and parenting classes are filled with warnings about child safety!
Our kids are shocked when we tell the stories of riding in the back window ledge of cars in the 50’s. There were no seat belts, of course. Our own children sometimes stood beside us as we drove, and I clearly remember my older daughter standing up a lot in the high chair, without being buckled in. Oops!
What about outside play? As a youngster, I remember running through the barn and fields, throwing "inappropriate items" at my brother. Bikes were ridden without helmets, and we played in the road a lot. I am fearful about sharing the escapades of my husband as a kid, at risk of giving some of the kids some bad ideas. Case in point; climbing a tree and having a friend chop it down while he rode it to the ground! By the 70’s, my kids were still swinging on a rickety, rusty swing set. Today we check every single thing that a child plays on or plays with, to make sure the child is safe from injury. I’m still not sure how any of us made it to adulthood.
As far as food is concerned, the old days of eating everything off the potluck picnic table still sounds good to me. 95% of everything was wonderfully homemade by our moms. I think my mom only "eyeballed" the meat, to check for done-ness, and nutrition labels didn’t exist (which did contribute to those diabetes and heart attack numbers of that era). By now we have gotten into a type of mini-hysteria over food handling and safety. We check the wrapping, the label, the fat content, the sodium (way too much), and we could lose some weight from the anxiety about food. Our lives have been extended with this information, but somehow we survived our own mom’s kitchen back then.
At school we have one emergency plan after another. The list next to my emergency pack includes directions for what to do about bleeding kids, windstorm, fire, intruder alerts, and earthquakes. Staff assignments show where our own personal emergency station is, and we each know our job. Thankfully, large containers of medical supplies, food and water, and scores of other items are on hand, on campus at all times.
What have we traded? In my childhood, it appears that we were unknowingly at risk every day, as we happily went through our early years. Accidents did happen, and children were hurt. Fortunately, we got it together, and by 2006, most of us are quite safe physically.
There’s more to this story, though. Back then, we had moms and dads in the home. I could ride my bike for miles and be safe. TV time was restricted, and somebody helped with homework. I knew there was a gun in my home and it was not for me to ever touch! Any profanity or disrespectful talk was stopped immediately (which in itself made the atmosphere more comfortable). There was no internet porn or violence in front of our faces. Steadfast people insisted on it! Finally, family was paramount.
So isn’t it interesting that we have flipped the coin? After years of working to prevent physical injuries, we’ve actually achieved most of it. The fear of injury has faded, but our personal priority shifts have put other kinds of fears into our children. The snowball is rolling faster and faster down the moral hill, and it is not too late to divert it.
